Pollywogs!

When I was younger, I never worried much about oral health…brush twice a day, visit the dentist once or twice a year, no problems!

Once I hit about 19, suddenly my mouth began betraying me…I went to the dentist and had a cavity!!!  How could such a thing happen???  I was shocked, but not terribly concerned…my dentist can make me all better, right?

So this happens for a few years (coincided with me abstaining from alcohol, maybe some bacteria got out of wack without the yeast holding them in check?) and culminated in a near miss of needing a root canal last spring.  I started to actually care about my oral health…dentists are expensive and I'm vain enough to care how my teeth look.  The root canal repair left a fairly severe food trap, which I needed to keep clean.  Problem is, cleaning it usually hurts.  I flossed half-heartedly and started using a fluoride mouth rinse twice a day.  I ended up bailing on the flossing and six months later had two more cavities filled, way on the upper outsides of my top left and right rear molars.  Great I thought…my upper left tooth is a cyborg, more machine than man.  The dentists recommended one of those electric Oral B toothbrushes and I was like, sure looks like a scam.  Spoke with Kell about it and we decided what the hell…its only $50…(notice the sarcasm?).

Let me tell you, that thing is the best $50 I've ever spent.  We like it so much we took it into the jungles of Mexico with us!  The few times that we haven't had it, and had to brush with a stone-age manual brush…terrible, felt like we weren't getting anything clean, couldn't reach, etc etc…

Primarily, the small head and vigorous action means that you can really reach way back and make sure everything is clean.  I could hardly fit a manual brush along the upper outsides of my top rear molars…this thing can reach every surface.  

So, the dentist said if I did a good job maintaining oral health, I could kick my visits from six months to a year.  However, I'd need to add flossing to my regime.  Six months later, no love…I hated flossing.  I'd floss maybe once a month.  Luckily I didn't cause any significant damage with my lack of flossing, but there was still enough plaque that they could tell I wasn't ready yet.  So, this time back from the dentist I'm doing it all:  The Oral B, the Act rinse, flossing my food trap every night, flossing my entire mouth once a week.  

I am definitely a minimum effort sort of person (as you can tell by my lack of proofreading before hitting the submit button on my posts here…), but I feel increasingly compelled to keep my teeth in my head.

Damn planned obsolescence isn't going to take me!  I'm living forever, and I'll be twenty years old the entire time!

EDIT: I forgot a step, on my last trip to the dentist they gave me a tounge scraper.  Now I can't understand how I could ever go without it.  On one side are two rows of bristles, on the other two rows of slightly scalloped undulating ribs.  Wonderful device!